Outjammed

Every so often, you come across a Jammer so admirable and focused that you question your own allegiance to the Jam.

Case in point, Saturday night. King was stumbling home after two hazy nights of self-destruction, and he decided to take a pit stop at the local taco stand for some much-needed nourishment. The stand was a circus of bar fallout and late-night feeders, each one screaming out his order: Four steak! Dos lengua! Uno Mas!

While waiting patiently in line, King witnessed perhaps the single greatest taco victory ever...

A wide-eyed jammer, liquored beyond belief, stumbled around the stand shouting out his demands: SEVEN POLLO TACOS AND ONE HORCHATA!!! Then, in an act of total disregard, with his eyes set squarely on the Jam ahead, he passed through the self-serve condiment line, opting to swoop up the onions, limes, and cilantro with his bare hands rather than use the provided tongs. Snacking on one of his seven tacos, he jumped back on his skateboard and rolled into the night. If you listened closely enough, you could hear the magic words under his breath as he fled the scene. "Jam, Jam, Jam, Jam, Be There..."